Old Folks

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Remember, old folks are worth a fortune, with silver in their hair, gold in their teeth, stones in their kidneys, lead in their feet, and gas in their stomachs. I have become a little older since I saw you last and few changes have come into my life since then. Frankly, I have become a frivolous old gal. I am seeing five gentlemen every day.

As soon as I wake up, Will Power helps me get out of bed. Then I go to see John. Then Charlie Horse comes along, and when he is here, he takes a lot of my time and attention. When he leaves, Arthur Ritus shows up and says the rest of the day. He doesn’t like to stay in one place very long, so he takes me from Joint to Joint. After such a busy day, I’m really tired and glad to go to bed with Ben Gay. What a life!

The preacher came to call the other day. He said at my age, I should be thinking about the hereafter. I told him, Oh, I do that all the time. No matter where I am, in the parlor, upstairs in the kitchen or down in the basement, I ask myself now — “What am I here after?

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